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January 19, 2006 / TildeWill

Married

I guess you could ague that it started back in September when I started rock climbing with Kyle. I met Sarah, a woman who works at RockQuest. Sure she was cute, but I never think about dating employees of places I frequent. I say that it started about a month ago when I was buying new climbing shoes. Chasity was going to assist me, but then Sarah was like “I’ll help him!” and half pushed Chasity aside. It opened my eyes a little.

Since then I made it a point to talk to Sarah more and what not. Last night I had set out to take it outside the climbing gym. My goal was to get her to come out to coffee with Kyle, Trent, Nikki and me. When she showed up half way through the night, she wasn’t working, I figured surely I could lure her away from RockQuest. It came out that she had plans to go to a local bar, but that I was welcome to come. So we all went.

The seats worked out such that I was able to sit next to her “Jackpot!”, I think to myself. We talk, everything is going well when all of a sudden she mentions her husband. I don’t know if I was able to contain the disappointment from showing in my face, but we kept talking until I finished my beer and I paid my tab and left.

First, I’m disappointed in myself for letting myself get so hopeful that I could be let down. And it wasn’t even a rejection, just a dead end of sorts. The second thing that really eats at me is that when she told me her husband was a micro biologist, it all came back to me, I knew she had a husband, she had told me that months ago and I just wasn’t paying attention. Yeah. Dumb brain.

So now I’m doing my best to forgive myself for forgetting information that would have been important later on. It’s not easy.

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