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July 4, 2005 / TildeWill

Governing Value: Adoption

I was writing to a friend about my experience with adoption and I found something that intersected with another ideal I had been studying in myself. First off, yes, I’m adopted. It’s ok, I’m not dying so wipe that strange look off you face. I really like that I’m adopted.While I don’t know for sure, to me the situation was such that my birth parents, while both employed and in their twenties, felt that they could not provide the life for me that they felt I deserved.

It takes a certain kind of amazing constitution it to let go of your own flesh and blood and know that you will probably never see that very important person ever again. This ties into my concept of "Doing what is right despite you own personal wishes, no matter how strong". I think that several times in my life I have let people go, even pushed them away, not because I stopped caring, but rather because I recognized an deficiency in myself to provide what that person needed from me. I won’t say if I was right or wrong here, but I will say that this is a concept that has been ingrained in me by the earliest act of kindness shown to me.

Someone else was willing to part with their own happiness so that I might be happy. It is no trivial matter that I seem to have taken it upon myself to pay this act of kindness forward, since I know not where or how to pay it back.

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