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April 13, 2005 / TildeWill

Pull Over!

So on my most recent trip from Lafayette to Florence it was a beautiful
day and so I was cruisin’ down I-74 with my windows down. All of a
sudden I hear a small *tink* like a pebble hit my windshield. I glance
over to the passenger side dash board and see a bee. "Aw jeez! I hope
he’s dead otherwise this could get ugly!", I think to myself. I look
closer and his ass thorax
is smashed into a goo and he’s not moving… much… ok he’s still
alive, but he’s missing 1.3 of his body, he’ll die soon… right… his
wings are moving, that’s cute…

At this point I decide I better pull over at the gas station ahead. I
start to get on the off ramp and he’s now stumbling around sans-thorax.
I’m stuck behind a semi and there’s no shoulder between here and the
gas station… the truck couldn’t move slower if it were going
backwards, the bee is now walking around pretty well at this point and
he’s looking at me.

We get to the gas station and the bee is now making small flight hops
around on the dash… the truck is still ahead of me and at this point
I’m certain that the bee is going to kill me. He’s looking directly at
me now, wings ready, legs bent, rage -mode fully engaged. Finally I get
to pull over, stop the car, and finish the bee off with a tissue.

It is only at this point that I realize his stinger was left in the
puddle that was his butt on my dash and that the worst he could have
done was bump into me.

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